Have you heard that “Real women have curves”? Or “She has curves in right places”? But what if your curves aren't in “right places”, or you don't have them at all?
The saying “curves in right places” is typically used by someone who used to be really skinny, then gained weight (fat and/or muscle) and has now more curves than before. Our society now says that she's more “real woman” because she has curvier butt or boobs.
We can train a certain body part to build more muscle mass, sure. But a lot of how our bodies look like is determined by our genetics, our skeletal structure, where we naturally tend to store fat, etc.
For example, I tend to build arm & shoulder muscles fairly quickly, while my butt won't ever reach even 1/3 of Kardashian's butt, and I'm totally cool with that 🙂
My body fat tends to accumulate on my stomach instead of naturally landing on my hips and butt. There's not much I can do about it.
Comes out that I got curves in TOTALLY wrong places! But I only laugh about it, because to me, having or not having curves, or having them in “right” or “wrong” places doesn't make me more or less of a woman.
What Not Having Curves In Right Places Really Means
Does it mean that I don't care how I look? No. I do care.
Does it mean that I wouldn't like more muscle in those “right” areas? No. I would like it.
But do I think about it constantly and let this ruin my mood? Absolutely not.
And I hope that you don't, either.
Saying “curves in right places” is not that much different from things like “Strong is the new sexy” where “skinny” is replaced with “strong”. It always changes based on what kind of look is trendy at the moment, skinny malnourished look or lean CrossFitter type of look.
Muscles Are Awesome But They Don't Make Anyone More or Less of a Woman (or man)
I like muscle. I respect the hard work that goes into building it. But that doesn't mean that this person over here is better or more “real” and this one is worse and less “real” because they have more muscle/less fat or less muscle/more fat. No one is more woman just because she has curves in right places/flat butt or big boobs or no boobs.
Just be you. Move the way that feels good, that makes you happy. Build some muscle because it’s healthy. Do it reasonably though, without over training yourself. Surround yourself with positive messages and stop following social media accounts that make you feel bad.
Make it your goal to LIKE yourself because your curves are already in right places for YOU.
Check out my FREE guide, Strengthen Your Mindset Muscle, to start building a better relationship with your body.